I've just caught myself doing it again...
Having found a lovely priest and agreed the outline of our wedding contract, we're still trying to find a wedding venue that will manage the number of guests and our budget. A venue that won't charge us an outrageous corkage fee for our own champagne (7 euros per bottle in some places!). We've realised that by using a family caterer we can get a marvellous spread but then we have to compromise on the decoration of the venue. We're chasing our tails a bit and hoping to find the right venue, in the right place, with the right quote and the right facilities. Soon!
Whilst I re-read my lists, trying to think ahead, I have hopped, occasionally, onto this site. It's the kind of place that gives you sensible advice, sells you a few solutions and has a message board for all bridezilla's across my home land.
However, when I do pop by to the message board, I've stopped reading the posts with women gloating about their budgets, dress selection, endless supplier searches and expensive guest favours. They make me feel inadequate and panicky. Yes, I plan on marrying in seven months and I have no venue or fixed date and a tight budget to boot* and there are women panicking that eight months before the wedding they haven't decided which dress to order.
So, instead I head straight to the posts that are titled "Sorry, this is long..." "Bit fed up..." "Don't know what to do". Here I can read about women who suspect their partners are cheating; want to call the wedding off; have real mother in law's from hell; catering company's went bust taking their deposit. You get the picture.
And I'm not gloating at them at all. I just feel so much better and in perspective about what I have to do. I log off and go happily on my way again, trying to keep the wedding as simple as French tradition and family's allow.
This is not behaviour unique to the wedding. My mum has commented on this before, I get myself into the doldrums and then pick myself up by finding someone who is having a far worse time than me and ... suddenly... I feel fine!
* Which reminds me of a project manager I used to work with who would tell me, mantra style, we can do things fast but they cost more or we can do things slower and they'll cost less.